The Lost Art of Mechado-making

Today was a blah day. I was sick yesterday and I had no choice but to rest the whole day today. Eat, lie down, watch TV, eat, rest in bed, sleep, watch TV. The only redeeming factor was that my ever thoughtful Enrique called me up to check on me.

And then came my depression attack. Over dinner, while just staring at the food I was about to eat, it just dawned on me that I do not cook at all. Sure, I had some lessons in high school, and this one-day training at Sylvia Reynoso-Gala cooking class, but I never put them into practice after. Back in high school, I used to cook the "best" steak ever tasted by my family, as well as really tasty and rich mechado. But as soon as I hit college, I hardly visited the dirty kitchen.

I don't know. I suddenly had this panic thinking, what if Enrique's mom will disapprove of me simply because I do not cook? And sure, he may be head over heels in love with me right now, but what if that mellows down, and practicality goes into his head, and then he suddenly realizes that I'm a no-good-wife-to-be??? Now I wish I was like my mother who knows how to cook really good food.

I know, I know. I probably am in the high range of the weird-o-meter. But I just couldn't help but wonder, if I lost the art of cooking, will I lose the man I love?

Yes, it probably is one of those depression attack days when I cry over nothing, or over something as flimsy and as shallow as having small feet (ergo very difficult buying really nice shoes). Maybe I'm just all so paranoid that I will "lose" another man that I love because of another "fault" of mine. I know that if he truly loves me, he will accept all of me, the good things and the flaws. But I just couldn't shake the feeling that I will disappoint him one way or the other, because of how I was brought up, pampered and all. I guess in some ways I have to change certain things about me, without changing who I really am.

But when it comes to cooking, as a starter, maybe I just need to rediscover my cooking skills. Or at least remember Vanessa's secret mechado recipe.