Of Buying Stuff Now

I must admit that other than having more savings and personal fulfillment, part of the reason why I went back to work is to reward myself without the guilt of using the husband's moolah. Yes, my dear lover has no issues about this whatsoever, but I know that at the back of my head I shouldn't be spending that much because it's only him who earns income.

And so in my one year of being a housewife I have curbed all (ok fine, most) of my appetite for big ticket stuff and lived simpler. Believe me, I didn't have a hard time -- maybe because I never lived beyond my means in the first place.

Zoom now, I'm back to work and of course, earn a couple of bucks. I rewarded my little daughter, my "secretaries" at home, and planned to reward the hubby when he's back (shoes or htc desire 2.2 perhaps). Then of course, I want to reward myself as well.

Yet here's the problem. Much as I want to get something I have longed for since early last year, I couldn't bring myself to click the "Purchase Now" button. I already typed in my credit card details, because this is really a once in a lifetime moment where I get this chance to purchase it, but no... I chickened out.

My thoughts? It's expensive. It's more than the little girl's tuition already. You know, those guilty-feeling thoughts.

Did one year of being a housewife truly altered my spending habits? I mean even while doing the groceries, I'm still very conscious unlike back then when I was working (before I stopped).

Is this is a good thing?

My husband must be sighing with relief.

Oh well. We'll see.